By Itohan Ferguson
The “gongo aso” crooner had an interview with Funmi Iyanda, it isn’t so much the interview that has me shaking my head at his absurdity, but hidden therein is a truth the typical Nigerian male is yet to come to terms with. In his interview, 9ice opines that the institution of marriage isn’t for our generation, I am waiting to here in what direction he will be taking his argument in, after all I have firm belief in a powerful and persuasive argument, then he dashes my hope that I will be enlightened by an intelligent discourse when he says, “I still want my woman to serve me and kneel”…
This is an inconvenient truth a typical Nigerian man is yet to come to terms with, men like 9ice grew up in households that compelled subservience in its totality from wives, implicit obedience, deference and mindlessness from a woman. And these men are ill equipped in relating with not just a non conforming woman, but one with a strong sense of individuality. Rather than respect her individuality, the marriage elicits a strong sense of desire to bring her to heel, stifle her and beat total submission and subservience from her. This is a major reason why most Nigerian marriages are unsuccessful.
Most men of today will prefer an educated dummy as a wife, one who may have all her degrees, be a financial juggernaut while raking in millions but still be a mindless puppet, commensurate to having his cake and eating it to. It is sad that women are evolving and most Nigerian men are yet to to evolve in their relationship with women as wives.
Expecting to model today’s woman consistent with the credo of women of the past is a recipe for disaster in a marriage. It is not enough that women are getting self aware but men should become conscious of this experience. Instead of fear and servility in s relationship, alternatively today’s marriage will do well if it is founded on the premise of respect and individuality. Servility and absolute submission is not respect.
If Nigerian men won’t evolve in their perception of the new Nigerian woman, they might as well marry mannequins, who like 9ice will shut up kneel and serve him like a demi god.
Watch the interview below: