8 Things you should never do after a breakup

8 Things you should never do after a breakup

Mfonobong Akpan

Breakups can be a very difficult experience. You feel hurt and betrayed. You also may feel the need make your ex feel just as bad as they made you feel, so you feel better, but it doesn’t work that way. Below are some revengeful acts you must avoid after a breakup.

1.Social media – stalking

When things turn sour between you and your partner, don’t turn to Facebook or Twitter to vent or comment bitterly on everything he/she does. While it may make you feel better momentarily, you’ll probably regret it later. Slamming your ex on Facebook makes you look bad, which is something you don’t want. Even though it’s difficult, choose to conduct yourself with manners and grace. That’s a decision that you’ll never regret.

2. Acting like nothing happened

Except that relationship meant nothing at all to you then you could probably dust it off and move on. But if it did, brushing it off and ignoring the fact that you’re hurt won’t be helpful either. Allowing yourself to feel sadness now will help you recover in the long run. I’m not suggesting you get (or stay) too down in the dumps, but it’s just part of the healing process, so cry if you must. You’ll be good as new in no time.

3. Don’t keep calling

They don’t want to get back together. They don’t want to talk to you. In fact, they may have deleted your contact info from their cell the second you left each other. So, stop. Just stop. Calling isn’t going to get them back. And, really, why would you want to get them back? You deserve someone who values you and wants to be with you.

4. Dating your ex’s friends/ Rushing into a new relationship

It’s usually not a good idea to date your ex’s friends. It may be okay after some time has passed if you genuinely have an interest in each other but going out with one of his buddies immediately isn’t a good idea. This is especially true if you’re just doing it to get back at your ex. You could end up hurting the feelings of your ex’s friend, which isn’t want you want. Besides, it’s best to give yourself some time to recover from a breakup before you start dating again.

5. Talking poorly about your ex to others

It’s perfectly okay to share your hurt and angry feelings with family or close friends. You need someone to talk to and that’s understandable. What you want to avoid is bashing him/her to everyone you know. If he/she is a true jerk then you can trust that his bad behavior will show to others without you ever saying a word.

6. Trashing belongings that are in your possession

Most of the time, you have various things that belong to your ex in your possession when you break up.  I know you may be tempted to trash them! I understand those feelings of anger. But don’t give in to them. Return his things to him in good condition and you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing you did the right thing.

7. Make problems for his new girlfriend

I get it. Most people never have something nice to say about the one who replaces you, and you’d like to let him/her know about it. A wise word of advice here: don’t. What happened isn’t their fault. If you and your ex broke up because he/she was messing around then he was the one that chose not to honour your relationship. Let karma get both of them; it’ll do a much better job than you ever could.

8. Don’t Give Up

Regardless of how the breakup made you feel, don’t let it destroy your future. Continue taking care of yourself. Take some time to refocus and pursue the things you’ve always loved to do. Spend time with loved ones. You found love before and you will find it again. Learn what you can from the relationship that just ended and move forward. Your life isn’t over so don’t give up on meeting your perfect match. Be thankful that the wrong relationship ended to free you up for the right one. It just got better.

Have you been through a breakup lately? You’re welcome to share your after stories here.
Happenings Media