Emotional hoarding is when you hold on to memories and you find it difficult to let go of the past. It describes the act of creating severe emotional attachment to memories and past events, especially the bad ones in your life. You hold on to the slightest feeling or material attached to the event. If you do all these, you are an emotional hoarder.
It’s not your fault if something turned out the way it did. The moment you decide to ‘pretend’ as if something didn’t happen instead of facing it, crying it out if possible, you are hoarding it and the more you hoard, the tougher it becomes to let go.
Hoarders find it extremely difficult to let things go, because you have no closure to what happened, whether it is a break up or a painful experience. Here are ways to deal with emotional hoarding issues if you think you are a hoarder.
You have to accept that you are indeed an emotional hoarder, if you find it hard to let go of your feelings or attachment to material things, a person or event.
• State your story
You have to get a writing pad or notes in your PC. State everything that went down from the beginning to the end, know where things started falling apart and try to weigh the balance. How were you before it started? How are you now?
Now, it is time to let go of those attachments. Are they worth your peace of mind? Are they so expensive you can’t throw them away? Give them out to charity or just throw them away. The first option is preferable. But it’s your choice. If those things are bad, burn them.
• Let go
If you still have their pictures or you have their names written down somewhere, speak your mind to the pictures or names and burn or discard. Cry if you want, kick things, let out your anger, let go of all the hurt and pain.
Now that all is done, you should be relieved. It is time to forgive, forgive them and forgive yourself, too, for allowing yourself go through that. You are worth more than gold. It’s time for you to heal and move on. Don’t be too quick to move on, though. Take your time.